My children woke up and started the new year fighting?

My five and ten year old boys woke up today started to fight(yelling and such). It feels like they’ve set the tone for the new year. I know the gap in their age is part of the problem, but how can I get these kids to appreciate each other instead of going out of their way to be whiny and complaining of each other?

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15 Responses to “My children woke up and started the new year fighting?”

  1. d1goodman4u said:

    teach the older child to teach his younger things he is good at

  2. soloxine_rabbit said:

    Sh*t happens, don’t let it get you down HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!

  3. Avis A said:

    Congratulations. Your life is about as normal as it gets. You’re not going to stop that fighting. Leave them alone and let them establish their own pecking order. Don’t try to balance things out and make them equal. It won’t work.

  4. BH said:

    You’re the parent/adult/boss. Make it clear that the fighting whining will NOT be tolerated. If it occurs, make sure there’s a consequence every time until they learn it’s better to be kewl to one another than to p*ss Mom off.

    Kids get away with what they are allowed to get away with. Discipline isn’t often fun and sometimes takes a LOT of patience, but in the long run EVERYONE benefits from a well behaved kid.

  5. JOYCE M said:

    Tell them that this is not a good way to start the new year, and that you expect better things from YOUR children.. after all, aren’t they the best? Always build them up to the good stuff, instead of tearing them down for the bad.

  6. Adnan Sallam said:

    That’s normal. look at the bright side, that means they are healthy.

  7. Nick Z said:

    Fighting between the kids is an opportunity for parents to teach their kids fairness, justice, and discipline.

    Let each one of them tell you what happened and what they did. And then you decide what rules of behavior to make for them in order to avoid similar incidents. Perhaps you can tell them to come and talk to you when they cannot agree about something.

    And if they disobey these rules in the future, then perhaps you can withhold some of their pleasures such as watching TV, playing video games, and eating sweets for a period of time as punishment and encouragement to obey your rules.

    Such disciplining of children is a good preparation for adult life. This is what happens with adults when they don’t behave well. You can loose your job and all the pleasures money can buy, if you don’t work well. The same goes if you don’t listen to instructors in school. And there are many examples like that.

  8. Gem said:

    I am not criticizing your parental techniques, but I can tell you what my parents did wrong and how I did not allow that in my house.

    Let’s just say the 5 year old comes up to your crying that the 10 year old hauled off and hit him for no reason. My parent’s would go and yell at and ground the 10 year old without ever bothering to hear what happened, because the 5 y.o. said “I was just sitting there!”. In reality, the 5 y.o. had been calling names, taking toys, smacking and generally being a pain in the butt until the 10 y.o. couldn’t take anymore and finally hauled off and smacked the younger sibling.

    Now, what I did as a parent was instill the rule that any, and all, fighting ends with Mommy mad, and both kids in trouble. I did not care who started it, who said what, who did what. Both were put in immediate time out (at opposite ends of the house). Yeah, I heard a lot of “it’s not fair” and “I didn’t do nothing” (which usually was NOT true, but after a couple weeks the kids figured out real fast that any fighting meant immediate punishment and it did not matter who started what.

    Amazing after a few weeks the sibling fighting dwindled down to almost nothing.

    As for my parents? My little brothers now range from 36 y.o. to 30 and they still break out into fist fights at Christmas.

    General rule, unless you see the whole thing (and you never do) fighting is EVERYBODY’s problem, that should help you.

  9. Chelsea M said:

    My 14 yo daughter & 7 yo son fight all the time.It is perfectly normal for young children & adults.My daughter started her new year with a changed name (Anna to Makelah) and more responsibility.I then found out that it was my son making the trouble all this time.I let my son sleepover with his cousin and daughter stay with me.She spent her time working on schoolwork and went to bed at 7:30 p.m. on a Saturday.I then found she was the peacemaker.

  10. nachtmann2 said:

    My Mother had a solution to that problem when I was a child. She would call us over to her, then suddenly reach out and bang our heads together. Then she’d say “now go and learn how to get along”. Often we walked away rubbing the lump on the side of our head and not even remembering what we had been quarreling about.

  11. amberlicious81 said:

    they sound like normal kids to me. my brother and i are only 2 years apart and we use to fight like crazy when we were younger

  12. troy said:

    maybe you can find what they have in common and like and take advantage of that and lket them bond

  13. midtownirene said:

    It does hurt a lot when one’s kids fight – and feels so good when they cooperate.

    When my kids were little if they fought they both got in trouble. And if they did things together in cooperation – they had my ear. They used to be able to get around me by saying in a cute sing song voice “mom – we want to go to the movies as BROTHERS” and they could get me to pay for them both to go to the movies

    so both get punished for the fighting and both get rewarded for the cooperation.

    It seems to have worked – they are really good friends these days and very supportive of each other.

  14. nov_rain_793 said:

    There’s not much that needs doing. Just separate them when they fight, and threaten to ground them or whatever if they fight and follow through. If they hate each other, you can’t change that. Believe me. My little brother and I are still at eachother’s throats. My parents tried eveything, but the truth of it is our personalities clash. You can’t change their personalities.

  15. kingskid1961 said:

    Try doing something together as a family and allow them to choose the activities together. Most boys or children will start to get along if they do family activities together as at this time they really don’t know each other or what each other is capable of and by putting them together in activities they will learn to help each other and share a common bond.




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